It’s Not Always Fun to Hear
We have all heard people say it. It is one of the several things we hear on a regular basis that make us cringe a little inside, “Well…you knew what you signed up for when ….”
Only…did we really? We did choose to marry our spouses and we most likely knew that the military was part of the package (although some of us didn’t – take me for example). Regardless, until you are in the mist of military life, it is difficult to determine how it will affect you.
But as military spouses, there are some things we signed up for…
That We Love Our Country
Not only for the sake of our own spouses and families but for all the other men and women who are serving. We know that this life means sacrifice, even when that is hard. At the end of the day, we love our country. We see the reason why our spouse has to serve, why someone has to serve, why we need to have a strong military. We know that we will have to give things up, even if we don’t want to. We know it is all for a bigger purpose.
I have always had a huge amount of pride in being an American, in the sacrifice that all service men and women make and in the freedom that comes with that sacrifice. It is something that no one can talk me out of.
That We Will Love and Support our Spouses
This support can come in many different forms and ways. Whether that is standing by during a deployment or helping them through training. Whether it is being faithful during time apart or working hard to make sure they get any help they might need after a deployment.
We might not what this will look like over the years, but we committed to doing so. That is what spouses should do for one another, whether active duty military or not. I know many friends who have seen their spouses through medical school, police academy, law school, and all that comes with those in their career. Military life requires support as well.
That We Will Love And Support Our Children
No matter what happens, we military spouses are committed to loving and supporting our children through whatever military life throws at them. Deployment coming up? We will research the best tools and resources for them. PCS taking them away from their friends? We make regular Skype dates so they can stay in touch.
We will fill the role of both mom and dad, doing what we can when our service member is away. All the while making sure they always know they are loved by the service member. This love and support is never ending.
That We Will Be a Part of The Military Community
Although sometimes finding your tribe isn’t easy, we know that there are plenty of good military spouses out there to befriend and get to know. After all, the military community is a good one. There are a lot of supportive people that we can connect with and who are ready to serve and love at a moment’s notice. During my last pregnancy, I contracted pneumonia and then broke my ribs due to coughing. I was able to call a fellow MILSO, who promptly set up a meal train to help lift some of the burden on my family. Many of these MILSOs I didn’t even know, but they rallied to help one of their own.
So we take pride is finding out tribe everywhere we go. Whether it is through the FRG or MOPS community, befriending others in your neighborhood, or finding a good friend in an online group.
That We Can Thrive
Military life gives you the opportunity to test out your own two feet. From taking care of the kids, house, car, pets, finances, etc, its a LOT to put on your plate. But somehow, MILSOs learn how to take those experiences and thrive from them. We learn an array of things we would have never envisioned ourselves knowing because we have had to learn it at some point when our spouses are away. And we learn and grow through everything thrown at us, even building our own self-care practices along the way.
Developing this mentality is something that can happen to us after various separations; many times we don’t even notice it because it is just a part of being a military spouse. We learn to take care of our family and make the decisions needed to survive and thrive. This is what we signed up for.
I Guess There Are Some things We “Signed Up For”
While we may not know exactly what we signed up for in military life, there are some things we DO know. We know that we support our spouses, that we love our children, that we are a part of a wonderful community, that we love our country, and that we can thrive. No matter what comes our way.
What is the most difficult part of military life for you?
