There you are – the first day.
You knew this day would come: the first day of deployment. But you sort of wished that it was all a bad dream. You watch your SO lace up his boots and you swallow that knot in your throat. There is so much silence!
Then you help load up everything and head to the meeting point. It is dark – why do they have to get up so early? – so you are able to better hide your feeling and keep a positive look on your face.
Then just like that, you have completed the drop off and head home. Now to tackle the first day of deployment, which always feels like the longest day of your life. Does this sound familiar? Or is this something that is coming soon?
How do you manage?
What do you do now? What about all these emotions bottling up? Although the first day is rough, here are 7 tips to get through it and be ready to thrive!
Prep the Night Before
Have a plan set out the night before of what your day will look like. Maybe you have errands to run, children to get off to school or a job to get to. Set our your clothes, prep the meals, pack a lunch and load your car with what you will need. Having a plan in place that you use to get move through your day can sometimes make the transition a little easier.
Go Back to Sleep
Depending on your schedule, going back to sleep can sometimes be exactly what the doctor ordered. Not only does it help pass the time quickly, but it also can give you that “fresh start” when you wake back up. Just make sure not to sleep the day away and set an alarm to wake back up and get moving.
Get Moving
After my husband’s 3rd deployment, I immediately went to the gym. I was pregnant with my 2nd so I dropped off my oldest at the child watch center and walked the tracks while listening to my favorite podcast. Endorphins really do wonders for someone’s mood and ability to cope. In addition, for following deployments I always made sure to have some sort of fitness goal I would want to accomplish, whether that was completing the Couch to 5K program or going to the gym 4 days a week. Starting off that goal on day 1 can be a game changer for the entire deployment!
Phone A Friend
Your tribe is there for you. They are there to laugh with, to cry with, and to help manage the day-to-day aspects of life. Don’t be afraid to go out and find your tribe. Our tribe is important because it helps to fill any void for companionship, gives us a sense of belonging and also validates our values and beliefs. Exactly what we need during a deployment, especially the first day!
Get Outside
There is almost nothing as therapeutic than going outside and spending time in nature. Even if you can’t be completely outside due to the weather or schedule, work on being as close to it as possible. Sit by an open window, do some deep breaths to really soak in the fresh air, close your eyes and enjoy. If it is sunny, soak up that vitamin D. If you can combine this with some physical exercise (walk/run maybe) even better!
Have a Yes Day
Are you feeling like some ice cream for dinner? Do the kids want to go to the park? Maybe have a pajama day? Why not!? Setting aside the first day of deployment as a YES day can give you some positive vibes. Plus, once you fill your cup, going back to “real life” won’t feel so gloomy in the end. Just make sure it doesn’t carry on into consecutive days. And just as an extra tip, having a few more scattered YES days throughout the deployment can really help break up the time apart from your loved one.
Have a Good Cry
The first day is not going to be fun, or easy. You will find yourself seeing their shaving cream on the bathroom counter and it will tug at your heart. Or you will notice that they left their cup in the sink and you will long to not have to wash it. Your emotions are completely valid and you have permission to express them. Seriously – its ok to cry! But once you have a good cry and get it out, it’s time to move on. That doesn’t mean you won’t be sad throughout the deployment, but know that dwelling on it is not healthy. So cry and then move forward.
You got this!
That first day can be tough. You may feel you are ready for deployment, but one really never fully is. However, taking some time to manage your emotions and schedule can make a lot of difference in getting through that first day.
Remember, you are not alone. And before you know it, it made it through!
Congratulations friend, the first day is done. Now on to the rest!
