How Body Image Can Affect Self-Care.

Body image. Boy, oh, boy. How many of you have struggled with body image issues in your lifetime? Raising my hand over here. Most of you may be shocked, turn up your nose, and utter a few %&*@ after reading what I have to say, but please don’t click away or ignore what I have to share about my body image struggle and how it affected my self-care. Trust me, someone you know has felt or may be feeling the same way this very moment. And that someone might be you. Silently dealing with hurt others say and “joke” with you about daily.

My name is Sybil. I’m a tall, skinny, woman with big curly hair. I’m a mother of three, intelligent, beautiful, tall, and skinny girls. And oh, I consider myself pretty intelligent too. 🙂 My body image struggle WAS my size. Being tall and skinny WAS a daily struggle for me. 

SHOCKER! Right?! Like who has body image issues because they are skinny? 

Society paints and states that being skinny is beautiful. So why in the heck was it a struggle? 

Why would anyone who is naturally skinny HATE their body, and how does that seep into one’s self-care?

From a very young age, I was called names like:

• Toothpick
• Olive Oyl (from the cartoon Popeye)
• Bean Pole

I was told that I would blow away with the slightest bit of wind. And omg, as a teenager to hear a boy say, “I think you’re pretty and all, but you’re just too skinny for me to date.”

People wanting to size my wrist and waist. Hmmmm….you’re a weirdo, back up. It rates up there with people asking if they can touch my hair.

Anywho…

It didn’t stop at childhood playground torture. It continued and continues to this day. I’m 43. O~~~~KAY! 

The day I finally said no more!

I recall the day I finally said F it! Here I was, a grown woman, married, with three children, and stationed in Japan. I walked past a group of women every morning who made daily comments about me. It started with stares. Then pointing. Then I heard mumbling. 

Nope! I didn’t say a word. I went home mad and hurt day after day. 

However, their words began to shake me a bit. I say shake because I learned from years of hearing skinny comments and jokes not to allow others’ words and actions to break me. But it was hard. My husband was out to sea, and my girls were young. Talking to anyone about it was always dismissed in the past. So, why share my hurt with someone now to only be rejected or told that it’s all in my mind because EVERYONE wants to be skinny and that my life is easy when it comes to being accepted, finding clothes, being healthy, etc.

Months went by.

But I guess the day came for one of the ladies to get REAL bold. Loud and clear, I heard, “She’s so skinny. Does she ever eat? Cause she could use a burger!” Chuckles filled the air.

It had to be addressed

I watched my kids enter the school, and I did that fast roll up on your butt walk.

“Excuse me. My name is Sybil, and I’ve heard your comments about my body for a couple of months. I want you to know it’s rude and uncalled for and hurtful. What if I asked if you ever stopped eating? You wouldn’t like that now, would you? And no! There’s nothing different about you saying it about me and me saying it about you. It’s RUDE & HURTFUL! And as a matter of fact, YES! I eat!”

SILENCE. And then, an “explanation.”

“Oh, we all think you’re beautiful and wish we could be your size. You can eat anything you want and not gain a pound.”

Please stop making this your response. It’s not ok.

Body Image Struggle and Self-Care

Here’s what many people forget or don’t consider when making comments to skinny people.

Many naturally, skinny people want to gain weight. We try. And sometimes we do so at the expense of our own health.

• Years of hearing…eat! It messed with me. I would eat pure junk because it would “help” me gain weight and I would stuff myself until I would throw up. Because… just eat junk. It will help you gain weight. Luckily for me, I realized the path this could’ve led me down and stopped. 
• A healthy diet is part of one’s self-care and I started to veer away from making healthy meal choices.
• I would listen to and “laugh” at the jokes friends made about me because they were just jokes. Right? Nope! That wasn’t good for my mental self-care. 
• I felt out of place if I wanted to workout or was out walking. Why? Because people would ask me why did I need to workout? Why was I trying to lose weight? Working out is more than weight loss: It’s self-care. 
• I’ve talked to family members of skinny teenage girls who have tried to commit suicide because of being skinny shamed.
• I have talked with other skinny people who struggle daily with their mental and physical health due to body image struggles from the skinny end.

Things Need to Change.

If you are reading this and you’re a skinny person. Love your body. Take care of yourself. Learn to walk away from people who continuously ridicule you about your size. Trust me, those words and their actions take a toll and affect your self-care. Go for that walk, run, or hit that gym. Skinny people need to exercise too. Don’t allow anyone to make you feel less than who you really are. Take care of you!

And if you are someone who makes skinny comments, take note. Watch the person’s body language. Listen to them when they say that it’s not ok. It hurts!

For everyone, no matter your body size – Know You Be You Love You®